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Chevy Chase Christmas Vacation Quotes

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“Dad, that thing wouldn’t fit in our yard!” — Rusty Griswold
“It’s not going in our yard, Russ. It’s going in our living room.” — Clark Griswold

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“Thith tree is a thymbol of the thpirit of the Griswold family Christhmath.” 

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 “A lot of sap in here! Looks great. A little full. A lot of sap.” 

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“Honey, they’re family—not strangers off the street.” 

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“Your mother waxes her upper lip?…Hmm doesn’t show.”

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 “I was just smelling…smiling! I was just blouse…browsing!” 

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Famous Christmas Vacation Quotes

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“It wouldn’t be the Christmas shopping season if the stores were any less hooter-hotter! Then they are.”

 

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“I was just looking at something for my wife, God rest her soul.” — Clark Griswold
“God, I’m so sorry!” — Mary
“Oh, no, no! She’s not dead. Yet. We’re just divorced. She’s history.” — Clark Griswold

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 “Can’t see the line, can ya, Russ?”

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 “I’ll, uh, park the cars, and check the luggage, and, uh…I’ll be outside for the season.”

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“Oops, a little knot here. You work on that.”

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 “Surprised, Eddie? If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn’t be more surprised than I am right now.”

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“I just can’t believe you’re actually standing here in my living room, Eddie.”

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“Going for a new amateur recreational saucer sled land speed record—Clark W. Griswold Jr.!” 

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Aunt Bethany Christmas Vacation Quotes

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[after reaching the Griswolds’ house]

Aunt Bethany: Is this the airport, Clark?

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Aunt Bethany: Is Rusty still in the navy?

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Ellen: Oh Aunt Bethany, you shouldn’t have done that.

Aunt Bethany: Oh dear, did I break wind?

Uncle Lewis: Jesus, did the room clear out, Bethany? Hell no, she means presents. You shouldn’t have brought presents.

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Clark: Since this is Aunt Bethany’s 80th Christmas, I think she should lead us in the saying of Grace.

Aunt Bethany: [turns to Lewis] What, dear?

Nora Griswold: Grace!

Aunt Bethany: Grace? She passed away thirty years ago.

Uncle Lewis: They want you to say, Grace.

[Bethany shakes her head in confusion]

Uncle Lewis: The BLESSING!

Aunt Bethany: [they all pose for prayer] I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic for which it stands One nation, under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.

Clark: Amen.

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Aunt Bethany: What’s that sound? Do you hear it? It’s a funny squeaky sound.

Uncle Lewis: You couldn’t hear a dump truck driving through a nitroglycerin plant.

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